19:52 - 02.08.2002
Mortified
Listening to: "I Will Survive" by Gloria Gaynor
I was mortified today.
As you well know, I hired a friend (Devonna) to find out if Mike has a gf or not. She tells me that she asked him, and he said no. Of course, at this moment in I was just seconds from jumping for joy. But then reality promptly slapped me in the face. So, she then proceeds to tell me that she told him that it was me. She told him it was ME! GOD!!! I hire someone to do one simple thing. One simple little tiny insignificant task, and what does she do? Humiliate me! She told me after school, so it wasn't like I had to see him again that day, but still. I was mortified. ABSOLUTELY MORTIFIED. But Devonna told me that he said that he already knew. See I don't know about that. A perfect stranger could tell me what their name is, and I can say that I already knew that. So ... yeah.
There's a dance. It's next Saturday. Devonna told me that he seemed like he was interested in me, and that I should ask him to go with me. To send him a carnation (they're selling them at school) with a proposing note. So many things wrong with this picture. First of all, I don't like dances. I don't like many of the asshole preppy bitches that go to my school, and would be at this dance. Next, I don't want to go to a school event with him, as like a date-type-thing. I don't know what it is, but I just feel really uncomfortable in school. I won't ever wear a t-shirt to school, without having a jacket on over it. But going to Target or the post office or something, I'm fine with it. Anyway, I'd just much rather go some place else, if I were to go out with him. Which, by the way, is still pretty much feeling impossible at this point. And every other point.
But hey, who knows what will happen? I'm off to check my horoscope to see if it'll tell me what's going to happen. Recently, I've been shunning all things zodiacal, but I'm desperate for some clarification here.
