3:10 a.m. - 2001-05-25
Beginning of the End
Time seems to go by so fast when everything is almost over...
As most of you already know, the school year is coming to an end. There are so many different things going through my head right now. Like, what will school be like next year, my last year. And if I'll ever see certain people again, like seniors who are graduating and going off to college. A part of me is scared of the future, and another part of me is so anxious and anticipating the future. Yearbook distribution and signing, at my school, is June 1rst. My birthday is coming up soon, June 5th. I'm not too excited about it. I'm turning 17. You know...the big ONE SEVEN! Anyhoo... We've got final exams on June 6th and 7th, the last 2 days of school. I failed 3 out of 4 classes last semester, so I may have to go to summer school, which is from June 18th to the 29th. I really, REALLY don't want to go. I hate to be persnickety over semantics, but I'm sorry! It's called SUMMER VACATION. It's not a vacation if I'm going to school! Even if it is only from 8am-Noon. It's vacation deprivation! It's not right! It's not fair! Okay, I'm done revolting, at least for now... I start behind-the-wheel on June 19th. So, I'll probably have my license by the beginning of the next school year. Which is SO good, because I'm as SO SICK of riding that godforsaken bus! I'm not quite sure you understand the severity of the situation....
I live in Milwaukee, a relatively big city. And I attend high school is a suburb of Milwaukee. It takes about 20-30 minutes for me to get to school. I'd say about 90-95% of all of the people who attend the school are white. Most of the people who are of a different ethnicity than white, are bussed in from Milwaukee, like me. Sometimes, the things that they do...god, the stupid ass things they do, makes me somewhat understand why ignorant people are racist. And not only that, but they all hate me. Okay, maybe that's an overstatement. All of them, except for about...3 or 4 people. It's a little bus too...a little yellow bus.
I'm also struggling with the future and what I want to do with mine. I used to be so set! I knew what I wanted to be, where I wanted to live, and all that good crap. Now...NOW! I'm dying!!! In the last 3 months, I've gone from profession to profession: guidance counselor, teacher, photographer, magazine editor, graphic designer, interior decorator, the list goes on and on. I keep telling myself that I have plenty of time to make this decision, and I do. But the sooner I realize what I want to do, the better.
