12:36 a.m. - 04.16.2002
The Ex-boyfriend and a new Crush. Either way I'm alone.
Yeah. The ex-boyfriend. What is it with them?
So, I was talking to him on the phone. And things were so nice. I mean, just so great. I remembered months and months of on again, off again, arguments and whatnot. But this was great.
And you know, being how I'm just pathetic and lonely I was thinking maybe we could work it out, eh?
Of course, I'm stupid. There were tons more reasons for ending it other than the bickering. For one, he's not smart. I'm not asking for the most intelligent guy in the world. But he'll make up words just to try and sound smart. When he just sounds like an ass. He talks during the movie. Movie, tv show, whatever. He's talking. And if he's seen it, odd are I'm gonna know how it ends within the first 2 minutes.
There are other things, but I'm not going to bore you. God forbid. =/
I invited him over to talk about us. I was searching for a reason. Something that said to me that I should be with him.
Needless to say, he left. And I - empty-handed.
No biggie. There's another crush around the corner: Kevin.
Okay, okay. I shouldn't even be crushin' on this guy for sooooo many reasons. First, I do believe that I am not in my right mind to make sound decisions about who to like and not to like when I'm feeling so lonely. Loneliness is bitch, ain't it? Also, I'm pessimistic about this topic. You know this. Well, at least I know this. Even if I did really want to do something with said-crush, I would be such the chicken-shit about it. And how many months of school I got left? Would I actually work up the courage by then to ask a guy out?
So ... bye, Kevin. You've officially left the Erica's Crush Arena. Come again soon!
Maybe I'm just meant to be alone.
