10:46 a.m. - 08.05.2002
Late Last Night ...
Very very late last night I was feeling very peculiar. I'm usually up during the midnight snack hour, but last night I was feeling strange.
I ate four maraschino cherries and had some left over lasagna. And it was then that I started to ponder.
It was strange how easy it is for me to trust people. They say things or do things that make me believe in them. But no grand commitment has been made. At least not one that would imply a trustworthy relationship.
I fall in love easy. I do. That's one of the drawbacks of being hypersensitive.
I guess from a certain perspective one could say it's a good thing: that I get more opportunities than your average skeptic at feeling that magical feeling we call love. But your average skeptic never got hurt nearly as often as I have.
I watered the flowers outside this morning. There was a very tall green plant, without any flowers, but with four or five stalks that stood about six feet tall. I aimed the water just so on each stalk only to leave them unfettered after a few seconds. The plant moved like it was alive.
I did this for a good five minutes.
I don't just trust easy. I'm easily amused as well.
I never eat in the morning. Though I am usually hungry.
Maybe I'll start the day off differently. With some more of that left over lasagna.
Maybe, just maybe ... this one tiny insignificant alteration to my normal daily plan will result in a colossal, and very significant, change in my immediate future.
