01:43 - 02.07.2002
Idiot
Listening to: "Groove Is In The Heart" by Deee-Lite
Day after day, things happen to further remind me of what a huge idiot I am.
I overslept today. I know! I KNOW!!! It's like the eighteenth time in the last few weeks, but ... you know how it is. I got that new alarm clock, where I can wake up to my cd. I don't think it works though. I swear by the Snooze button, and after I hit it the first time ... I never hear the alarm again.
I've been on diaryland for some time now. Like almost a year. A year, folks. I just found out that I have a "buddy list." I don't know. How long has that been there? The whole time? And how long has that chat thing been there. I just found that like 3 minutes ago. Diaryland chat? Since when...
Though I may be an idiot, I've been a horny idiot today. Maybe this is taboo or something I shouldn't be talking about, but if you want to leave, you can. I watch Dawson's Creek today (yeah, I watch that show.) and there were just a few scenes in there that just got me all ... hot... You know.
Lately I've been good. You know, about the whole loneliness thing. Looking back, I don't have that many recent entries where I cry and cry about me being all alone and what not. Though I must let you know now, nothing's really changed. I'm still alone. Just too much other shit going on that I have to complain about first.
Have I told you my goal for this semester? 4.0. That's right. I've never ever gotten one, and this will be the semester I get one. My classes are really easy, except Pre-Calc might be a tough one. Last semester I got two D-minuses and two C's. My goal was to pass. Now 4.0... Some would say I'm raising the bar a bit too high on this occasion (like my mother). But I'm capable. I hate that too. It's one thing being stupid, and trying, and getting C's and D's. It's another thing to be smart and fully aware of it, and fully capable of getting straight A's, and getting C's and D's. Gosh. When I put it like that, I feel even more like a stupid idiot-head. Anyway. That's my goal. Just thought I'd let you know.
Valentine's Day is coming up. I was thinking about writing one of those "what's the point of Valentine's Day - I'm all alone - who gives a fuck?" kind of entries. And I probably still will, but just thought that I would warn you. But who knows? Maybe by then I'll be with Mike.
Yeah, right. Who am I kidding? I'm just an idiot.
